I Love You.My Friend.

Truly Madly and Deeply.

Today it's her B-day.
The one who have make me so obsessed.I love her,Indeed.
Who will she thinking in this meaningful day of her life?At least I know it will not be ME.

We are already lost contact in a couple days.Does she have ever think of me?Does she know that I am exist?
I'm sad.I just can't get over her,my minds my heart and dream are full of her image.I don't even know I can have a moment to not to think of her.Every little things she told me,it all made my day.

I watching my cell phone,I decided not to press any button.I just tired of beings the silly and innocent guy.SHE WILL NEVER BE MINE.wake the fuck up !
I'm not blaming her,she never gave any promises to me even the reply of my confession.

I'm just a NOBODY.
I thought I am living in the heaven,but matter fact is,I am living in my fantasy.

I'm a day-dreamer.

Now I believe that Retribution is exist.
Those girls and boys that I have had hurt in past,they are taking all the revenge to me.
I can hear their shattered heart.

Clearl Louder and hurtful.

You told me,we are friends.
Ya.FRIENDS.We are just a friend.

To my friend,
I thoughts I'm the special one to you.I was thinking that we can share ours Happiness,Sadness and so much more to each other.I was truly believe that you and I will holding each other hand until forever.
However,It's time to wake up.I have to accept the fact. The cruelest part in my life.

How many times I cried and devastated,It all are unimportant.
I don't believe GOD anymore,but I still asking him to bless you and take care of you as a begger.

I asking God does HE love all his children?And questioning myself.

Why would u hurt me so long?

People that I have Love,hurt me the most.

They keep on hurting me or I'm the one who hurting myself?
I don't know.

I'm kinda afraid to love again.Not now.
there is too much scars,full of scars.I just can't bear with it anymore.

It's Hurt.It's Killing me.
My heart break without bleeding.

I'm so done.
I don't understand it.My Lord.
I don't see the light.I just don't see it.

Am I deserve it?Didn't you love all your child?

I'm moaning.
I'm Sad.

but I still have to disguising in front of all the people who's love me so much and not to make them worry about me.

this is tough.


Why?
I'm asking you,I'm questioning myself.